Following the repeal of "don't ask don't tell," I received an email from President Obama celebrating this victory for the country (okay, he wasn't writing to me personally - I'm on the mailing list). "The fight for civil rights, a struggle that continues," he wrote, "will no longer include this one." Of course I was pleased with the change, but my commitment to marriage equality reigned in my enthusiasm. I wrote this letter with his email (which oddly didn't address the marriage issue) in mind and sent it to USA TODAY, where a number of my letters concerning gay marriage have been printed. The letter was published on December 27, 2010 in the middle of a blizzard in New York City, and I was unable to find the paper that day. Thanks to my mother, who mailed me a copy from Texas.

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Repealing "don't ask don't tell" is indeed an important step forward for gay Americans and for this country. But the celebration wanes quickly because the ultimate bar to equality - the ban on gay marriage - has yet to be lifted. President Obama kept his promise to do away with "don't ask don't tell," but bringing about marriage equality remains the test of his convictions. Then, and only then, can the president claim a true civil rights victory.